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  ‘It’s beautiful.’ Emma said. She was stunned, she felt like she had walked from reality onto the front of a Christmas card. She squeezed Dan’s hand in hers. ‘It’s really beautiful. Thankyou Dan.’

  ‘I know. I thought you’d like it.’ Dan said pulling Emma closer and kissing her forehead softly.

  ‘Like it? I love it. I’ve never seen anything like it.’ She stood in front of him looking up into his eyes.

  They stood for a moment, just gazing at each other. They were surrounded but felt alone. Like Adam and Eve, the only two people in a perfect world. People brushed past them on either side, some heading towards the market and some leaving. During the day the market was lively. Children ran around eating chocolate and looking at toys. At night the families were still there but they were outnumbered by couples. They all had the same smile, they knew that nights like these would stay, frozen as perfect memories forever.

  ‘Come on babe, we should go take a look.’ Dan said.

  ‘Ok. Just another minute though please?’ Emma said.

  ‘No problem. If I didn’t have a warm hotel room waiting I’d stand here all night with you.’

  ‘We aren’t going back yet though, are we?’ Emma asked with a little sadness in her voice.

  ‘No not yet. There’s some stuff to do first.’

  ‘Oh, like what?’ Emma asked.

  ‘I thought we’d get a Gluehwein and stand by the fire, then just walk around a little.’

  ‘That sounds lovely, I’ve never had one of those.’

  CHAPTER SIX

  ‘And when’s the senior review?’ Dan said. His headphones were comfortable and made conference calls less painful than they could be but after half an hour he was still making no progress.

  Emma watched from the hotel bed and smiled when Dan looked at her, she could see his boredom and frustration despite only hearing half of the call. ‘I’m jumping in the shower.’ She said quietly, mouthing the words carefully and pointing to the bathroom so he would understand.

  Dan nodded. ‘Ok, so you would need them a couple of days before. Then you’ve got chance to review everything and make changes. Would the Wednesday work for you?’ Dan held up his hands in apology to Emma.

  She smiled and slid off the bed pulling her white robe together as she stood. Emma didn’t need a shower but German television was terrible and she’d forgotten her book. She walked to the bathroom and pulled the door closed behind her. The bathroom was small but the shower enclosure was large. It was tiled throughout in a sandstone colour and the heated floor made her feel cosy whenever she walked in. Usually she didn’t like being barefoot in hotels but she’d left her slippers with her book. Emma turned on the shower and slipped her robe onto the chrome towel rail, it would be nice and warm when she put it back on. This room had made her determined to have a heated floor and towel rail when she finally replaced her bathroom.

  The room was soon warm from the heat of the water and the mirror fogged up, she smiled and drew a heart on the glass. Today had been amazing and even Dan’s urgent phone call couldn’t ruin it. She waved her hand under the water and it was perfect, she stepped in and slowly turned under the water letting the jet massage her shoulders.

  Germany had been a complete surprise, she expected the market to be good but nothing like it was. She smiled, scrubbing her body and remembering how perfect it felt drinking hot wine around a fire and how she thought it couldn’t get better watching the snow fall. It was as close to a scene in a snow globe as she imagined was possible and then coming back to spend the night with Dan would be the perfect end to the day.

  She rinsed the bubbles from herself and reached for her moisturiser. She rubbed it into her body, closing her eyes to continue the daydream. He would be stressed now and she knew he would then be stressed about being stressed, he worked hard and it was to be expected but she wished she could relax him a little so his day was as good as hers.

  Emma turned off the shower and stood for a moment letting the oil sink into her skin and patted herself dry with her towel. She was relaxed before she pulled on her robe, the soft warm towelling did nothing but sooth her further.

  Emma opened the door and walked into the room, she raised her eyebrows in surprised disappointment when she saw Dan still on the call. It would be an hour by now and his eyes managed to apologise and look pitiful at the same time.

  Their cuddle would have to wait so she lay decided to lay on the bed alone. She walked towards it, pulled back the quilt and then stopped. Her eyes flicked from the bed to Dan and back again. Bed could wait. She walked across the room to Dan and stood in front of him.

  Dan pressed the mute button on his phone. ‘Sorry, it shouldn’t be much longer now.’ He fumbled to unmute himself. ‘Err yes of course.’

  Emma smiled and untied the belt of her robe. She let it fall to the floor at her feet and watched as shock followed by excitement spread across his face. Emma reached down and took his hand, sliding it up her inner thigh so he could feel the softness of her skin. Usually she would never be brave enough to take the lead but this felt like a holiday romance and Dan relaxed her, like she had known him for years.

  Dan shifted in his seat, his dry mouth opened in a mixture of shock and arousal. He sat up to touch her body more but she put a hand on his chest and pushed him back into the seat. She looked into his eyes and smiled as she slowly lowered herself to her knees. He reacted by pushing his feet further apart and leaning back.

  Emma tugged down his shorts, Dan lifted himself so they slid down easily and she tossed them over her shoulder. He was ready for her before the shorts landed on the bed and he had to put his hand over his mouth to silence the groan when she leant forward and kissed him. His eyes rolled and his phone conversation changed from words to noises of agreement.

  Emma stopped and pulled away, she stood and Dan looked at her unable to understand what was happening. He watched her naked cheeks as she walked to the bedside table, it was perfect and even from behind her could see the outline of her breasts as she reached onto the table to pick something up.

  She smiled when she saw him watching and raised her finger to her lips to tell him to be quiet. She walked back towards him enjoying his eyes on her and the new feeling of confidence she had with him.

  Emma knelt between his feet again. He relaxed back into the seat, unsure what she was planning. He looked into her eyes, his eyes showed confusion and hope that she would continue. She smiled back and reached behind her head pulling her hair into a ponytail, her breasts wiggled as she used the hair scrunchie to keep her hair in place high on her head.

  Dan was unsure what she was doing but his thoughts were wiped clean when she leaned forward and continued what she’d started.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  ‘Nan.’ A pause. Nan.’ He shouted as he pushed open the door to the ground floor flat. ‘It’s me, Jaz. I’m coming in.’ He made the drive to Basingstoke once a week but it was starting to feel longer each time.

  ‘Who is it? You can’t just come in here, I’ll call the warden.’ A weak voice called back

  ‘Nan it’s me, Jaz. No need to call the warden.’ He shouted closing the door behind him with his empty hand. He walked across the brown swirled carpet, the kind old people always had to hide spillages. ‘Busy’ was how his Nan described it. He ignored the family pictures and ornamental plates hanging on the walls and walked into the front room.

  ‘I’m calling them now. I am. I’m calling. Oh, it’s just you. What do you want? More money I suppose?’ His Nan said, not moving from the floral wing back chair.

  ‘No Nan, no money. I don’t want money. It’s Valentines so I brought you some flowers.’ Jaz said louder than usual.

  ‘You always want money, always have done. Grabbing shit.’ She said the last words in a voice she thought nobody could hear. Her hair style hadn’t changed as far back as he could remember, although it was now thinner, hovering around her scalp like a silvery blue aura. ‘I haven’t much left but you
can have some if you leave me in peace.’

  ‘Nan. I don’t want money, honestly, I’m fine. I just thought it’d be nice to have some flowers to brighten the place up a bit.’

  ‘I don’t like flowers. They set off my allergies. You know that, is that why you brought them? Try to kill me off so you can get the rest of my money?’

  ‘No Nan listen. I just thought you’d like some flowers at Valentines. Show you I love you and that.’ Jaz said wondering why every year she went through the same routine but he still bought her flowers because the one year he didn’t he had to hear how Joan’s granddaughter bought her the most amazing bouquet ever.

  ‘I can feel my allergies playing up now.’ She forced a series of coughs to demonstrate how badly she was suffering.

  ‘Do you want me to get rid of them then Nan?’

  ‘No no, that’s just a waste of money. You’ve got them now. I’ll just have to suffer for a few days.’ She said.

  ‘I can take them away if you want, it’s no issue.’ Jaz said, his voice still raised.

  ‘No. Just put them in a vase and put them down there on the table.’ She said wafting her hand towards the dark wooded dining table at the other end of the room. ‘Out the way and stop shouting, I’m not deaf.’

  Jaz walked into the kitchen to find a vase. The sink overflowed with dirty dishes, pouring out onto the side counter. He opened the cupboard under the sink and found the vase he wanted, he pushed a space in the dishes, filled the vase with water and slid the flowers in. He screwed the flower packaging into a ball and walked to drop it in the bin at the end of the worktop. It was full, the lid wedged open by a half empty tin of baked beans. There was no liner inside and the beans had spilled into the rest of the bin. He shook his head and walked back across the busy carpet to the dining table and put the vase in the centre.

  ‘Nan, why’s the sink full of dishes and the bin over flowing?’ Jaz asked.

  ‘Huh?’ She mumbled looking down.

  ‘The dishes, the sinks full of them and the bins full.’

  ‘I haven’t done them obviously. It’s not easy at my age.’ She mumbled.

  ‘You have a carer come in though. Why haven’t they done the dishes or bin? That’s what they’re supposed to do.’

  ‘That little bitch? I told her I didn’t want her here anymore. She was stealing.’

  ‘Who was stealing? She’s been coming here for years and hasn’t stolen anything. What did she steal?’

  ‘No not Joanne. She was ok, they changed her for some wog, Paki I think. She was stealing, they all steal you know. All them lot, just like your dad.’ She said shaking her head in disgust.

  Jaz ignored the comment. He’d grown used to hearing how anyone brown was bad and how his dad was the single worse Pakistani out of two hundred million Pakistani’s. When he was younger it had upset him but time and repetition had toughened his skin. ‘What did the girl steal?’

  ‘My watch. Little wog probably sold it on the eBay and sent the money back to her fifteen kids. They are always doing that, dirty little shits.’

  ‘Which watch did she take? Maybe you lost it.’ Jaz said.

  She sighed and shook her head. ‘I knew you’d side with her, you always do. Any chance you get to go against me and you do. I sometimes think you’d have been better off adopted instead of draining my life.’

  ‘No Nan, I’m not siding with her and I don’t want to take your money. It’s just that last time someone stole from you we found the bracelet a couple of weeks later, remember?’

  ‘I remember. She hid my bracelet so she could come back to take it later. Devious little bitch she was. You’re making me tired with all this arguing, you can go now. I want a nap.’ She said.

  ‘Ok Nan but first let me clean up. I don’t want you living in a mess.’

  ‘You don’t want me living, that’s the truth. You’ve had my house and now you want the rest of my money. You’re all the same.’

  ‘Nan, I don’t want your money. I just want to clean up for you. That’s all.’ Jaz said.

  ‘Do what you like, I’m going to nap.’ She closed her eyes as she finished talking.’

  ‘Ok Nan. You nap.’ Jaz said walking back into the kitchen.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  The doors closed behind her as she shuffled into the carriage. Emma had a seat booked but still had to wait for people to get to theirs before she could reach hers. The train was already moving before she sat down, the seat beside her was empty so she used it for her bag. She reached inside and pulled out her headphones, after untangling them from her keys she plugged them in and let Spotify go to work.

  She was travelling backwards so decided against reading, she closed her eyes and let the music accompany her minds wandering. It didn’t take long for her wandering mind to find Dan, she smiled when she pictured his face and her mind began a montage of memories.

  She liked him. She liked him a lot. She knew that and had from the first morning walking together in the snow. The location helped but she knew it was more than just one night in Paris. From the first few words she felt relaxed with him, like an old school friend she hadn’t seen for a while but who she could still share the same jokes with.

  She knew she was beginning love him. She was falling for him hard and fast. It had taken her until now to admit and even longer to know why. Dan made her feel relaxed enough to be herself but still feel wanted. Most of her boyfriends had done neither. She had noticed them in the past judging, once she noticed it was impossible to relax again no matter how small it was. A quick disapproving glance too long at her tummy or a comment about how much she enjoyed food. Sometimes it was her laugh. All small things. Nothing to start an argument about because it would be petty but when someone you care about confirms an insecurity, it stings like nothing else and she’d been stung too many times.

  With Dan though, things were different. Very different and she didn’t know how he managed to make her feel so at ease and desired. It was nice. She smiled to herself when she remembered catching him glancing at her cleavage while they ate in a restaurant. He wasn’t the only man to notice but his eyes were welcome and didn’t make her feel self-conscious.

  Being with Dan felt like one long holiday romance. It was a short, intense, magical experience. The kind that didn’t happen once you grew up. But like a holiday romance, she knew it would end. She didn’t know when or how, but she didn’t expect there to be an exchange of ‘I miss you’ teen love letters afterwards.

  Dan hadn’t made her feel bad once but she knew it would happen soon enough, when she got the call to say ‘it wasn’t her fault.’ It could be a text or email, that wasn’t unheard of but she hoped Dan would do it in person or at least on the phone. He seemed nice enough to do that. It would still sting but that was her fault, her fault for getting too attached, too quickly. Typical Emma, there wasn’t much more she could do now but wait, wait for him to end it and enjoy it until then.

  She pushed the sad thoughts out of her mind and focussed on how good he felt as the big spoon, her mind slowly became calm and she drifted off to sleep where she would dream about him until she arrived in New Street Station.

  # # #

  The new dress looked good, she’d bought it on impulse then had doubts but now Emma liked it again. She stood straight in front of the hotel mirror, smoothing out the fabric at her hips and twisting her body. There was a tummy starting to develop, she didn’t like it but hopefully Dan would be too busy looking at her cleavage to notice. Another woman would notice right away but she knew where Dan’s eyes spent most of their time and sitting down to eat would hide the bits she didn’t like anyway.

  She turned sideways. Her bikini bridge was gone and that tummy was starting to push out a little too much. At the moment it was full of butterflies which wouldn’t be helping. Tonight might be their last date together, she had to tell him tonight, it was only fair to let him know so he didn’t waste any more time on her. She admitted to herself that her reasons weren�
�t just for him, she needed to tell him before she got any deeper. It would be much easier to handle the rejection now rather than wait until she fell for him completely, no it was definitely better to do it now. Rip off that plaster and get on with it.

  Emma turned from the mirror, she was as good as she was going to get and it was time to get this over with. Have some food and then see how the evening went, but tonight she’d tell him.

  CHAPTER NINE

  The car park was almost empty so Dan picked a space near the exit and steered his car slowly into it, the space was tight for anything larger than a Golf so his Audi overhung the lines. He slipped the lever into park and pressed the engine off button. The big V10 fell silent. He had fought back his inner boy racer’s urges to rev the engine in the confined space of the carpark, he loved the way his car sounded and performed while still looking like a sensible saloon. It had been a treat to himself when the business had taken off and his only regret came whenever he had it serviced or stopped for fuel, he justified the expense to himself by refusing to buy another weekend vehicle or motorbike like most of his friends. The Audi S8 had been his hearts need for speed filtered through his head continually saying. ‘Come on now.’

  He checked his phone, no messages. He was unsure if this was a good or bad omen. No message could mean that everything was fine and the plans weren’t changing but it could also mean that she had deleted his number or ‘forgotten’ about their date. He opened the app and began typing her a message and then realised how insecure he would look messaging her now. He shook his head and took a deep breath at how close he had come to putting her off if she was on her way. Dan stepped out of the car and walked to the boot, he opened it with the button on his key fob. He reached inside and pulled out his black leather overnight bag, he pressed the key fob button again and watched as the boot slowly closed.